PDA

View Full Version : Need Fishing Buddy - James/Chickahominy Out of Williamsburg


HawgHvn
07-13-2006, 05:53 AM
FISHING BUDDY RESUME/INTERVIEW

Practically begging to get guys to go fishing - The "Old Man" tied up with family business, CBTroutMan out of town, Lobster Boy recovering from being a lobster and Wknd Drnk working an all nighter - DOH! And now I've done gone and moved from Virginia Beach to James City County and I don't know ANYbody LOCAL that wants to fish the James or Chickahominy (though Racn35 keeps telling me we're gonna get into'em big soon when he comes up to go camping)!

SWMBO doesn't do boats and I don't go alone. Much. So, instead of out by the pilings jigging for stripers or drifting Chesapeake Bay by the CBBT for flounder, or setting up to catch the first 100-pound catfish in the James, I'm doing "Honey Dos".

If you are tired of Honey Dos and want to get some fresh air, read on. But keep in mind, selecting a good fishing buddy is harder than finding your soul mate for marriage - at least you don't have to spend 5 to 15 hours in a boat in the hot sun with your SWMBO week after week after . . .

SO. Taking resumes and conducting interviews for the position of Fishing Buddy.

Position Description:

I have an 18.5 ft BowRider with 130 I/O out of James City County (Williamsburg area). Will fish for just about anything that swims. Have to pick my days, but got a pretty good pick most of the time, 'cept lately like a lot of folks out this way. Don't mind getting wet, just don't like lightning or flood ravaged trees. Weekend day/night trips available.

Only 4 major rules.

1) No Illegal Drugs [if you are like me, you may be a walking pharmacy as long as it's all prescription];

2) No Booze [leastwise, not on the boat only as a safety issue. I'm not a teetotaler, just personally believe it's more appropriate after the trip];

3) No Illegal Fish [need that fine money per each fish for bait and gas];

4) New Guy Buys Breakfast [although I haven't been able to make that one stick].

I quit smoking a few years ago, but I'm not preachy about it and so don't mind if you do. Smoke that is, not preach. OK. You can BE a preacher, just don't BE preaching when you should be fishing.

Position Benefits:

All the fish you can catch, plus most of mine [with the exception of an occasional flounder for SWMBO and a couple of fish for friends once in a while, you are welcome to most of the fish I catch as well as ALL of yours. I don't keep most of the fish I catch cuz i don't eat much fresh fish - "eatin'" fish comes from a fast food store on a bun]. Plus, I hear some of them blue catfish have 3 eyes. Freaky! Fresh Air. My ascerbic wit [hey, ya gotta take the bad with the good]. If the Old Man is outta town, you get the whole bow, with padded seats, all to yourself. When he's on board, you get your choice of port/starboard aft deck and control of the radio volume.


Position Requirements:

Fishing License. Fishing Gear. No experience required [but what you have, you share]. Available on short notice [i.e., I plan Saturday on Wednesday or Thursday, not last month]. Fishing is more important than live football [or any other useless sport that doesn't involve immediate family members, unless you are willing to listen to cars zooming down the track on the radio - am/fm on board]. Abide by the 4 rules listed above [ok, exceptions to rule 4 may be provided for the right individual].

You must be willing to perform the following:

a) Cut your own bait - then share

b) Bait your own hook

c) Get that cow ray off the boat your own darned self

d) Man the net even if it isn't your catch

e) Operate the boat to keep us off the pilings when I'm fighting a really big croaker

f) Share your snack if I think it looks especially tempting.


Interview Information:

If your SWMBO is anything like mine, you won't be allowed to go off with someone you just met on the internet unless you can prove that he/she is not a pervert out for your body or a sicko out to kill you for your watch. Therefore, I highly recommend you bring the following to your interview appointment:

1) Your Wife. If you have one. Your girlfriend, otherwise. If you have one of each, please leave at least one of them at home for the first interview so you don't confuse me or make me jealous.

2) Your Kids. That's assuming you've made every attempt to get a baby sitter and they are all out fishing.

3) Your Dog. Ok, no chihuahuas. No cats, parrots, ferrets, rabbits, skunks or monkeys. I won't be impressed. Bring your own pooper scooper, I don't provide. If you have pet fish, they will be bait next week. Please don't act surprised or offended.

4) If you bring other relatives/friends/neighbors, bring drinks and snacks. I like parties.

Interested? email me!

RuddeDogg
07-13-2006, 11:55 AM
If i were down that way I would be the first in line. If ya ever get up here to yankee land keep that in mind. Good luck with your quest.

luvs2fish
07-13-2006, 01:28 PM
Reading this may be the most fun I have all day.
Acerbic wit is something I appreciate.

Good luck on your search. If I were closer, I'd apply.

BrokenRod
07-13-2006, 03:30 PM
I sent ya a pm

Bassplug
07-13-2006, 04:55 PM
Sounds good to me. Been looking for someone to fish with but you little to far away.

Bill

Fishbreath
07-13-2006, 05:02 PM
Pretty freaking funny!!! :D "...Do you like pina coladas, walks in the rain?..." Just kidding...:p

catman
07-13-2006, 05:19 PM
Hey HawgHvn, you forgot about cleaning the boat at the end of the day. That's my #1 requirement.;) I also make them bring the ice and a fresh cold cut sub for me.:)

bbcroaker
07-15-2006, 01:58 PM
Thanks a lor RCN35 for that personal info .
Was goin to answer Hawgs post but on that note I don't really think I should.:D

BrokenRod
07-15-2006, 03:02 PM
Thats hilarious:D

bigjohntate
07-15-2006, 03:13 PM
Shoot, the no beer eliminates me..And if Georgia Bulldogs or ANY title fight is on, then fishing can and WILL wait. Best thing i've read all month though..Publish it, with ending results

Jay

Blloyd
07-15-2006, 03:57 PM
That's awesome:D

HawgHvn
07-16-2006, 04:06 AM
DanG! Where to start?

RuddeDogg! Whereat in Yankeeland? Roughly for now would do. And is that a little Hawaiian there in the siggy? Lived there 15 years. Street was supposed to be called "Ala Napua" or "Street of Flowers". Some dumb haole added an extra letter and it became known as "Ala Napua'a" or "Street of Pigs". Great. I lived on Swine Lane. Wonderful. Love to talk story sometime! Caught my 235 pound Pacific Blue Marlin off the Kona Coast of the Big Island (along with a nice Ono, to boot). Got the bill mount and photo on the wall of my office.

Fishbreath! Don't mind rain, don't like thunder. Gave up Pina Coladas - they are what got me into trouble with Racn35 to start with. After 10-12 of them he really does start to look good!

Catman! You clean your boat? I find it better not to. That way nobody ever knows I had a bad day . . .

And Racn! You promised you'd never tell anybody about that makeup thing! Next I suppose you'll be telling everybody I wear depends, too. And pick my nose. And bite my toenails. Wait. Did I just say that out loud? And those stripers we caught on your boat? Yeah, those 35" to 39"? Guys up here tell me them minnows is catfish bait! And I didn't say we couldn't afford beer any more and that you had to quit - I said we couldn't afford any more SPACE on board the boat for beer and that you would have quit bringing so many lures or quit drinking after the fifth case.

I suppose I might find it easier to get off during the week, too, if I wasn't working a real job. But, you and Jack are welcome to come up any weekend with at least 48 hours notice! You know how to reach me . . .