# Tourons



## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

Deciding to have some fun. I'll keep this to just Florida for now.

So what's the worst place in Florida when it comes to fishing with tourons and what's your funniest touron story?


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## bjake (Jul 25, 2007)

They fish the Pcb pier.
Jake


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## KodiakZach (Mar 16, 2005)

I like to tell the Tourons on the Sunglow Pier that are from Ohio and such the following:

*Touron: *What are you guys fishin for?
*Me: *Fish 
*Touron: *(pause), uh yeah, but what kind of fish?
*Me: *Mainly Largemouth Bass
*Touron: *Wow, are there a lot of them?
*Me: *Sure are.... I got a 14-lb'er the other day right where you are standing
*Touron: *What else do you guys get out here?
*Me: *Mainly swordfish, sailfish, and the occasional Blue Marlin.
*Touron: *No kiddin? How big are they?
*Me: *Several hundred pounds. Last one I got on this here Sahara 4000 spinning reel was 487-lb's... man I couldn't believe I landed him!
*Touron: *That's unbelievable, on that little rod?
*Me: *Yup!
*Touron: *What were you using for bait?
*Me: *A purple bass worm, 8 inches long
*Touron: *Well how did you get him up?
*Me: *I walked him right down the pier and dragged him to the beach. Once he hit the beach my buddies lassoe'd him and pulled him the rest of the way in.
*Touron: *That's awesome, do you eat them? 
*Me: *Nah, they taste like catfish (which sets them up for the following comment that always ensues)...
*Touron: *Catfish, oooh I love me some catfish. We eat them all the time up in Ohio. Some of the best eating. 
*Me: *Well we don't like catfish down here, too many good fish to eat like blowfish, dogfish, and ladyfish....
*Touron: *Well thanks for talking to us, you have been more than helpful 
*Me: *Sure, no problem. Have a great visit!


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

My favorite is talking about how good pelicans, dolphins, and baby seals are to eat.  

Tourist: (looking at me) Oh look at the dolphins!

Me: Wow! I wonder if I've got that lure they like?

Tourist: What!?!?!? You mean you catch them?

Me: Sure do. You mean you've never had dolphin?

Tourist: That's horrible, I'd never eat them.

Me: If you've ever eaten canned tuna, you've eaten dolphin. Tastes just like tuna.

It only gets worse from there.

I like that one, or letting tourists catch a cooler full of ladyfish and tell them my "secret" recipe. I'm sure right now, somewhere in Illinois, someone is cursing me.


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## Railroader (Apr 13, 2005)

Spit some 'baccer juice, scratch your crotch real hard, and cut a loud fart...They'll move on.


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## EasyCheeze (Jun 27, 2007)

A touron one time at sunglow pointed to the moonrise in the east and asked a guy next to me "is that the sun or the moon?". The sun had already set like an hour ago.


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

That's one of the best I've heard.  opcorn:


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## VICIII (Apr 8, 2005)

EasyCheeze said:


> A touron one time at sunglow pointed to the moonrise in the east and asked a guy next to me "is that the sun or the moon?". The sun had already set like an hour ago.


There is a guy who enjoys his vacation...
:beer:


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## HellRhaY (Jul 6, 2007)

most often they ask, "what are you fishing for?"
or "what fish is that?".


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*yep*

We get em up here in yankee land to. Ain't nothing like being in a local tackle shop and a touron comes in and says, "Hey, where are all the fish at?" I just look at them like are you kiddin me. Just today I was in a local shop and a guy comes in with a Penn Captiva 5000 and asks the guy to spool it with 30lb mono  . I was gonna say something but I figured nah, why bother, he'll be back after he hooks up and burns the reel up so he buy another one.


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

Spinning reel upside down on a trolling rod, loaded with #40 hi vis, complete with a bass worm on a steel leader. I'm going to start taking pictures once I get a digital camera, some of the stuff I see, you almost wouldn't believe.


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

Up here we love tourists.

They pay 11% hotel tax, so we don't have to pay state income tax....

They keep half the people on the island employed....

They keep the local state park (with a pier) in business....

The city keeps the beach really clean to impress the tourists...

We have a lot of restaurants we wouldn't have if they didn't come here...

Everytime I see one fishing I always try and help them out. Never know, they might come back next year, bring their friends along, and spend more money...


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## barty b (Dec 31, 2004)

Surf Fish said:


> Up here we love tourists.
> 
> They pay 11% hotel tax, so we don't have to pay state income tax....
> 
> ...


Very True Jim..I Guess dealing with the tourons is part of the exchange we pay for living in THE FISHING CAPITOL OF THE WORLD. I say let 'em keep coming..They can be very entertaining on a slow day.  Actually I have seen Pier Locals with less sense tham some of the "tourons"


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## beachman (Apr 27, 2007)

Sad commentary to read. Really does not require response. I can only imagine the thoughts of an individual checking out this forum for help.


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## VICIII (Apr 8, 2005)

beachman said:


> Sad commentary to read. Really does not require response. I can only imagine the thoughts of an individual checking out this forum for help.


Ooohhh Kay...


I would think it would be funny when they read this. This is where people need to lighten up. I think real people would laugh when they read this. Deep breath people. Exhale... Now lets get back to complaining...


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## jurdun756 (Nov 3, 2006)

*allready shared this once but is a classic*

The Yankee's are here in full force 
found this one at one of my bait holes 
And reels in his line with reel on top! 
and said this is how we do it where I'm from 
the bait of choice waz corn and 5oz pyramid weight










his name waz Steve 
said he waz from Chicago and didn't mind a picture for this forum 
chatted with him and his two friends for a while
we talked about fishing and tackle for Florida 
gave him allot of pointers and some bait to help them 
they gave me some pointers on fishing and tackle for the windy city 
all in all good people just fish different tactics
we both had a laugh so i shared with you 
not at anyones expense


Not everyone has THIN SKIN per say

there waz fish here before tourons
and there will be fish here when they are gone!


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

That's priceless.


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*Well*

Had a guy bring a 3pc 15ft surf rod on a mackerel trip once, and yes I know the guy   . best trip I ever had.


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## fishinmama (Oct 14, 2006)

*everybody is a tourist somewhere*

i don't believe all tourists are "tourons" & when i am a tourist i try not to be a "touron" altho as a tourist that person is simply not as wise to the local customs, etc as are the locals -- and in travelling, i should add i've also run across my fair share of "mocals" (moron-local) or shall we call them "locons" (local-moron)  

so the knife cuts both ways, but i believe most true "tourons" are probably "mocals" when they are at home.  

now don't get testy--this post was meant in fun, but remember, that once we were all new to something and when we are out of our realm, we may indeed be "tourons", but when i travel i try to stay away from the "mocals" too.


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## barty b (Dec 31, 2004)

Yes, There are PLENTY of "Locons" too..."Locons" Thats great  :beer:


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

beachman said:


> Sad commentary to read. Really does not require response. I can only imagine the thoughts of an individual checking out this forum for help.


Nobody thinks about that stuff here, everybody is too busy playing We Da' Man....

As tasteless as this discussion is, it was started by our moderator, so it must be P&S approved.


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## TreednNC (Jul 1, 2005)

Anybody sensible enough to read this, looking for answers, would realize that these stories are about morons that wont take advise. If theyre reading this, then they obviously have sense enough to know that these are just humerous accounts about hardheaded morons. Weve all been there and done stupid things...we just learn from our mistakes and thus promoted up the totum pole from being a touron. Lighten up. Politically correct is not always correct.


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

TreednNC said:


> Anybody sensible enough to read this, looking for answers, would realize that these stories are about morons that wont take advise. If theyre reading this, then they obviously have sense enough to know that these are just humerous accounts about hardheaded morons. Weve all been there and done stupid things...we just learn from our mistakes and thus promoted up the totum pole from being a touron. Lighten up. Politically correct is not always correct.


I totally disagree with all of that. 

How do we know that the guy with the upside down spinning reel is a "moron"? Did somebody give him an IQ test?

Lack of knowledge does not equal stupidity. 

Everybody wasn't born with a Zipplex in their hand, and didn't pop out of Mamma and tie a sixteen turn Bimini Twist in the umbilical cord and then cast 8 & Bait 200 yards across the delivery room (like some people here have claimed to have done). 

This "discussion" is about making fun of people who lack fishing knowledge. Plain and simple.

The people who lack fishing knowledge are the potential future users of this forum. 

As somebody already pointed out, they'd have to be nuts to sign up and start asking questions after reading this thread....


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## TreednNC (Jul 1, 2005)

TreednNC said:


> *Anybody sensible enough to read this, looking for answers, would realize that these stories are about morons that wont take advise.* If theyre reading this, then they obviously have sense enough to know that these are just humerous accounts about hardheaded morons. Weve all been there and done stupid things...we just learn from our mistakes and thus promoted up the totum pole from being a touron. Lighten up. Politically correct is not always correct.





> I totally disagree with all of that.
> 
> How do we know that the guy with the upside down spinning reel is a "moron"? Did somebody give him an IQ test?
> 
> ...


Just stating that most of these people were given advise


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

RuddeDogg said:


> We get em up here in yankee land to. Ain't nothing like being in a local tackle shop and a touron comes in and says, "Hey, where are all the fish at?" I just look at them like are you kiddin me. Just today I was in a local shop and a guy comes in with a Penn Captiva 5000 and asks the guy to spool it with 30lb mono  . I was gonna say something but I figured nah, why bother, he'll be back after he hooks up and burns the reel up so he buy another one.


Doesn't sound like those two got much "advise"...


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## TreednNC (Jul 1, 2005)

Per the first one...does anybody the halves of a pea for a brain really expect an answer when asked like that?

You may have me on that, but the reel is only rated for 12lb/200yds...30lb line being way away from what the reel is recommended for....read the box or ASK the tackle shop what they recommend

Surf Fish between you and Jetty, you FL boys are a force to be reckoned with lol


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## barty b (Dec 31, 2004)

Yo "E" I think your gonna have to lock your own thread brutha  GOD knows ya cant have ANY fun at other peoples expense around here....Dont worry bout ol Surf Fish..Just ask him why he wont step foot on the Jax beach pier.  ( I think it has something to do with the fact that he had to give WAAAY too much "friendly advice" to the tourons last time he was out there!  )


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

Barty, leave Joe out of this. I just checked up on him and the kids yesterday and they're doing fine. I promised to bring them some cookies next time I'm over there.

Matter of fact they were discussing the Pensacola Beach Pier, I think they're all planning on moving over there since the king fish season here turned into a fizzle. Saying something about somebody needs to teach them pan handle monkeys what a mud hook is for....

Slack up on the smiley faces too, your posts are starting to look like Jetty Spagetti.


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*My point was crystal clear*

Look at how the question was aksed. 

"Where's all the fish at?"........Well where else would they be. In the water. The man wasn't ignored at all. He was helped by tackle shop staff and my myself. What I was poking fun at was the question in it's context.


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## Railroader (Apr 13, 2005)

Damn...

Two guys whose opinion I value have made me regret spitting 'baccer juice, scratchin' my crotch, and cutting loud farts....:redface: 

Thanks for knocking me down a notch, Lester and Jim...Sometimes, a moment of pause is a good thing.


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

RuddeDogg said:


> Look at how the question was aksed.
> 
> "Where's all the fish at?"........Well where else would they be. In the water. The man wasn't ignored at all. He was helped by tackle shop staff and my myself. What I was poking fun at was the question in it's context.


O I C. Now that you've expanded the story, I understand. At first I thought you said "I just look at them like are you kiddin me." Good to know you really help them out.

What about the guy with the reel, did he burn it up and come back and buy another one?


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## can't fish today (Oct 8, 2003)

> Touron: What are you guys fishin for?
> Me: Fish


Quite funny. I'll be using that one.


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*Actually*

No he did not. When he said to have the reel spooled with the 30lb he was advised that the line was a bit too heavy for that size reel but he didn't want to hear it. He infact said, "I know what I'm doing.", which quite obviously he did not.


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## jurdun756 (Nov 3, 2006)

*Old Slatons*

old salts can be morons too  

Because he's too stoopid to realize it's got more mercury in it than his Mama's rectal thermometer.












what for dinner fish "rectal thermometer"


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## TreednNC (Jul 1, 2005)

lmao


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

Shark bait, Jungle Boy. Sharks don't care about mercury.....


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## Surf Fish (Dec 16, 2005)

TreednNC said:


> lmao


Be careful when you sit down, that could be painful....


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## KodiakZach (Mar 16, 2005)

Surf Fish, we always wait with bated breath to hear your perils of wisdom..... Once again your knowledge proves astounding. 

Say, do you have any pics of your poles in the sand you can share with the tourons reading this thread? Ya know, in case they don't know what a rod/reel looks like


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## VICIII (Apr 8, 2005)

*Again...*

Deep breath....
Relax. Life is not this serious.
I would think you can look at many of the threads here and see that they are not all out to help our fellow man and sometime we can laugh at what we do.. 
I tied a 3 ft "shock leader" for the first month down here. Yes I was a touron turned to Lowron. I think we can laugh and still be what we are today... 
_The best info based site on the planet_...
Now thats funny!!!!!


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

Here's my $.02. Lighten up, seriously. I can't believe I might have to lock my own thread. 

Ok, I'm going to go fishing, for kings. No, I'm not going to eat them. I've done some dumb things in my life, like getting married, but eating kings is not one of them.

Now, when I get back. I want to see some more touron stories. It's funny, we aren't here to be politically or touristy correct. If we can't have fun here, then where can we have fun.

BTW, I help tourists out, alot. Many of them come to me and ask what they're doing wrong. There's a reason I'm mentioning "tourons". Those are tourists who think they know everything and they're God's gift to fishing. You know the saying, "when in Rome"?

_"Matter of fact they were discussing the Pensacola Beach Pier, I think they're all planning on moving over there since the king fish season here turned into a fizzle. Saying something about somebody needs to teach them pan handle monkeys what a mud hook is for...."_

Now that I've fanned the flames enough, on my own thread, I'm going kingfishing, in a boat. So enjoy this thread and the purple sweatshirt guy who likes Surf Fish and kings. Because when I get home, I'm probably going to have to delete this.


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## nctrader03 (Jun 21, 2004)

Railroader said:


> Spit some 'baccer juice, scratch your crotch real hard, and cut a loud fart...They'll move on.


HOT DANG RR I KNEW WHY I LIKED YOU!!! YOU MUST BE FROM NORTH CAROLINA TOO!!! lol

Okay, so I'm a touron. But I want to say that I do thank those that take the time to help and answer any questions. I wouldn't suppose many of you sea lovers would know how to do some serious creek fishin' up here in the mountains of Western NC. You would probably have to ask a few questions yer self. All in all, if you asked me I would certainly tell you. So the help is appreciated. PCB better look out because next Friday here I come!!!! Fair warning....'baccer spittin', crotch scratchin', fart cuttin' touron on THE LOOSE!!! lol

Have a great one guys!

NCTRADER03


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## dirtyhandslopez (Nov 17, 2006)

No real probs with 'em, sometimes they add some humour to the trip and a lot of times, they willingly give you the small livebait they've just caught so you can catch daddy fish. An' when that happens, I willingly give up a few circles to em and show 'em how to rig up. In between bites and catching that is.:fishing:


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## fishinmama (Oct 14, 2006)

i didn't quite know what to originally think of this thread...but 
well by now, anybody who's reading this is probably laughing themselves silly & ready to sign up for the forum

i stand by my first post -- most tourons are probably mocals when they are at home

and the hits just keep on coming!!!


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## HellRhaY (Jul 6, 2007)

went fishing this ealry morning around 5:30a.m. after about an hour (w/ no hits) a guy set-up beside me. he has a hi lo rig baited w/ shrimp. after he cast it out:fishing: , he then went to drop his bucket to replenish water for his live shrimp bait, sadly he doesnt know how to tie a knot-- the knot slipped leaving his bucket w/ 3 dozen shrimps in the water: . 

then, he told me what an unlucky day it was, i asked him what happened and he told me. i told him he can have some of my bait, he then asked "what my bait was"- i told him, " live pinfish and pilchards". he said thanks and we talk for sometime. 

all in all, I got 1 giant snook w/c i put back in the water but during the fight he kept telling me , "tighten the drag, bring the fish in now!" 

at around 9:30a.m. i gave him my remaining baits and said goodbye. we didn't got each others name, but i bet he'll remember his unlucky day as not that unlucky...he got 2 mangroves snappers on my bait while i walk away w/ zilch.


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## The Crew (Jul 8, 2007)

Can one be a tourist in one's own state?


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## barty b (Dec 31, 2004)

YES YOU CAN!..Especially in FL!


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## KodiakZach (Mar 16, 2005)

Ya know, while it's fun to mess with the Touron's who are walking down the pier sightseeing (not fishing), I always help out the Tourons that are fishing. Most of the folks on here with Touron stories are the folks who do help out. So just because we have some funny stories of messing with people, it's not like some NE US piers where you don't even try to talk to the roughneck fishermen. Most of us are in FL and are happy to talk to people when we are fishing. 

Sadly I think everyone reading this thread understands that except for 1 or 2 idiots like Surf Fish. Or, maybe he does get it and he is just trying to stir the pot. Either way, you should go pop a Valium Surf Fish and go stick your poles in the sand and chill out. You are wound way too tight. Heck, if you get bored you might even try baiting your lines this time and throwing them out, then maybe you could actually catch a fish or two like the rest of us Mocals. Don't forget your purple hoody though, you never know when a storm might roll in.


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## Railroader (Apr 13, 2005)

And the trap springs shut...opcorn:


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## fishbait (Nov 11, 2005)

Let's see, #1 would be beachman and #2 would be RR. Do I win? This pic better be good, because that was one long a$$ post. KZ's wife isn't the one in E's sig, is she? She better not be holding that damn fish anymore!


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## fishinmama (Oct 14, 2006)

Surf Fish said:


> Whoever finds the MOST "idiots" wins a naked picture of KZ's wife in the pool. You have to play to win. Start reading....


i can only assume that a naked picture as herein referred alludes to an "unframed" picture, since the adjective "naked" describes the noun "picture"....if you are referring to a pic of a naked woman it should read
"whomever finds the Most "idiots" wins a picture of KZ's naked wife in the pool" -- herein the adjective "naked" identifies the noun "wife" --

sorry, just trying for some levity & i don't want any pics, naked or otherwise...this thread has gone from bad to worse & back, and has been both funny & nasty at the same time....

in our posts (mine included) we have been discussing tourons & mocals & i think we all are begininng to sound like "nitwits."


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## The Crew (Jul 8, 2007)

fishinmama said:


> in our posts (mine included) we have been discussing tourons & mocals & i think we all are begininng to sound like "nitwits."


Amen Brother!


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

Well, I thought this thread was going to be fun. However, thanks to a couple of people who have no sense of humor, whatsoever, I'm probably going to close it before long.

What I wanted out of this was to share the funny things you've seen tourists do because, face it, you're a tourist sometimes too.

This was supposed to be fun until someone went and pooped all over it. Thanks, SF. Just goes to disprove that old theory, "with age comes wisdom."


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## TreednNC (Jul 1, 2005)

Ill tell one on myself...Im a tourist everytime I fish the salt...I started out with an olllld diawa spinning reel, that was just numbers, no name back then....and a 10ft limp noodle ugly stick with 25lb mono, store bought rigs, and thought u had to have a fireball rig to catch a bluefish.... I wont go through the equipment I have now, but well just say that Ive stepped above that and took advise to those willing enough to share.


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*Don't close it*

I wouldn't close it. You original post was plain as day. This was started in fun. Not ment to pick on anyone. A blind man could see that.


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

RudeDogg, yeah, I'm not going to let someone who can't take a joke mess up a good thread.

I remember the first time I went saltwater (an idea for another fishing thread). I was 16 and I went to Duck, NC with my family for vacation. There was some beatup old rods in the condo we rented and I decided I was going to fish instead of putting up with my family. I went down to the tackle store and asked the old guy behind the counter for some pointers. I caught a striper and a flounder right out of the surf and I've been spoiled ever since. Did I look like a touron? Maybe, but did I have alot more success by listening to a local and asking for advice? Absolutely.

So, for now, I'm leaving this thread. KZ, I know you, you're good people. Don't let the chit get to you.


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## vulcanizedplease (Jun 24, 2007)

Way back in the day when I first started fishing, I fished with worms... in the river.


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## fishinmama (Oct 14, 2006)

i have seen the humor in this thread, and was surprised that it went so bad so fast, but you can't predict how a thread will evolve.

i don't know any of you personally, but if i'm ever in FL fishing i hope you'll cut me some slack & give me some good advice, even if i'm a touron. friend of ours runs a Carolina skiff out of Hommosassa-sight fished for redfish over the oyster beds with him a couple yrs ago--& that was great fun!! it was all catch & release.

KZ-i don't think you should let SF push your buttons with the "picture" reference--that is so 3rd grade of him--sorry SF, you're probably an okay guy too, but that was uncalled for...& i understand where you were going with your posts about calling ppl tourons, & making fun & belittling, so i don't understand why you then turned around and were mean to KZ.

so in the spirit of TreedNC i will tell you a story of my first head boat fishing:
went out on a boat out of the DE bay-the Island Queen with hubby, but this was before we were married so its over 30 yrs ago--this was our first SW fishing experience & we were so green--
we had little FW spinning rods about 5 1/2 - 6 ft & penn 712Z reels--do they even still make them?--we must have looked like a couple of rubes!! but it was all we had (now the arsenal is much more complete) -- our gear looked like kid's snoopy rods compared to those we were fishing shoulder to shoulder with--long story short- i was first hookup with a good sized weakfish, high hook (blues & weakies) & pool winner (big blue) --earned my wings that day & been hooked on SW fishing since-surf & boat. man those fish felt SO big on that light tackle.

i can see both sides of this thread & i'm hoping you all can too.


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## MarkDido (Jul 6, 2003)

I LOVE tourists!

Couple of years ago, I was doing some evening fishing at Cocoa Beach Pier. Wasn't having any luck, but they DO have a Tiki Bar at the end.

I ran out of smokes, and not wanting to walk all the way back to the truck, I asked the bartender if they sold cigarettes (they didn't)

This attractive and slightly inebriated lady at the Tiki Bar offers me one of hers. It's a Marlboro LIght but they're not too bad if you break the filter off!  

Anyway, I thanked her and went back to fishing. She sauntered up and asked me a bunch of questions about surf fishing (she was from Colorado) 

Turns out she's a Denver P. D detective, so we had something in common. (no, I'm not a LEO, but I do work in Law Enforcement)

We ended up getting hammered together at her hotel room!

I LOVE tourists!


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## jettypark28 (Jun 23, 2006)

*Holy crap*

i am gone for a day.....and nobody miss me.  But you guys still started "Drama" on a Thread that was suppose to be funny....damn!! lighten up people...and do what you must to keep smiling and laughing. Trust me life is way to short. Tourist hell, i have laugh at plenty of locals i crack up at the people chasing mullets with thier poles and lures, casting to them trying to catch them....I wait and then i tell them, the faces that some people have given me, is priceless.......I know we laugh at people, but am also sure (and hope) that everyone here, would go out of their way to help new people out. If i see them getting ready to grab a catfish or bluefish the wrong way, i alway yell at them. and show them what could happen, yesterday a friend (newie) came and got me, and we hit BPS to get him some gear....and headed to the cape,ICW....anyway this young girl hooks up to something and fight it for awhile, nice size ray (sharkbait) I went over and got it out of the water and remove the hook, well i said out loud..that this would make a good shark bait, the dad told me to take it.....The young girl (teen) look at me and said are you going to kill it. I told her that she caught it, so she got to decide what to do with it.....she ask if it was okay to turn it loose.....i told her sure...and we turn it loose together....it warm my heart to know that one day that young girl is going to make a fine fisherlady ......Yes we have alot of OOPS story about tourist, but we also have many of these....so if you are going to share, do both the funny ones and the ones that will warm all of our hearts.....i know i have plenty....and i love them all


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## sand flea (Oct 24, 1999)

So I've got a theory: there's a time of year when everyone goes nuts and the tone of a board degenerates. Those times are either a) when the fishing goes berserk and everyone has their blood pumping or b) when it's too miserable to fish outside and everyone gets cabin fever.

The cabin fever _I'm_ used to involves snow and ice and heavy coats. I can only conclude you guys are having a tropical version of cabin fever. It's just too damned hot to go out and people get a little stir-crazy.

The original point of Emanuel's thread was to share funny stories about clueless tourists doing something stupid. A couple of posts in, panties got bunched and feces met fanblades.

Deep breath, people. It's fishing, the stories are funny, we're all friends. (And a reminder: the unfriendly and the perpetually irritating get shown the door.)


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## AU-N-Cdn (Jun 20, 2006)

*A touron's(?) perspective*

I guess I am, or at least once was not long ago, a surf fishing touron. The posts on this thread are indicative of exactly what I have encountered on this forum (and others), in bait shops, on piers and on beaches over the past seven years in which I have learned salt water fishing in the south eastern US: some people have been sympathetic to my newness and very generous with good advice, some have simply brushed me off, some people have been deliberately misleading, and some have shown disdain and even animosity towards my presence or questions. It’s one thing to see the obvious humor in someone using ridiculously mismatched tackle or asking insanely out of whack questions, but unless your goal is to drive outsiders away (and for all I know, that might well be the case with some of you) a more tolerant attitude wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

The fact that you would feed someone a load of BS like that about fishing for Blue Marlin etc is just weak. Reminds me of an expression having to do with small things and small minds. If I put you in a situation that you knew absolutely nothing about and completely lied in response to your questions, how is it exactly that that makes me the smart guy and you the moron? Seems to me it’s the other way around. What would be wrong with answering the tourists’ question with the truth? With sharing your knowledge of a sport about which you obviously know a great deal? Would it not be just as entertaining to see the excitement on their face when you tell them about big cobia, or blacktips, and things you've done to catch them, as it would when you make up useless lies? 

I’ve got a thick skin and that’s why I’ve visited this forum for so long as a tourist, but there are names on here who’s posts I won’t even consider looking at anymore: past reading has taught me that these people are just like the self-inflated morons I have unfortunately encountered on many a pier or beach over my learning years. Fortunately, however, there are some great folks here who are generous with their knowledge, laugh easily at themselves and others for the right reasons, and don’t need to make other people feel small – whether in reality or online – to feel big themselves. These folks are the reason I lurk a lot and ask the occasional question and they have been extremely helpful.


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## KodiakZach (Mar 16, 2005)

AU-N-Cdn said:


> The fact that you would feed someone a load of BS like that about fishing for Blue Marlin etc is just weak.


Obviously you failed to read the part where the people I tell this to are the tourists walking out the peir sightseeing, not the ones fishing. Does this make you the moron?









Seriously though, I have helped more out-of-towners on Sunglow pier catch fish than you have probably talked to in your life about fishing. I learned most of what I know about fishing (when I started 2 or 3 years ago) from talking to people (locals) everywhere I went and reading on the fishing forums. For the most part, everyone has been helpful. In fact, I can't recall a single incident where I asked for help and was shunned. Although I do recall a few where they have pulled my leg *as a joke*. A story about a going into a bait shop on the Space Coast and asking for some shrimp comes to mind. The bait and tackle guy asked me if we wanted Male or Female shrimp. We explained that we didn't know there was a difference or how to tell them apart. He said the only way to tell them apart is to pull their legs apart and look for their ballz. At that point we realized he was kidding and we laughed, which worked out fine because I have a sense of humor -unlike some people on this forum.

Sorry your experience hasn't been the same. Perhaps you are lacking in certain social skills that prevents you from getting advice? Either way, you have to be thick-skinned and have to be able to take a joke to be a fisherman. If you can't manage that, then perhaps Ballet is a little more you style... something where people are a little more cognizant of your apparently sensitive feelings...


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## HellRhaY (Jul 6, 2007)

i've leanred long ago the fishermen are clowns, jokers and the best----> liars...ask them the size of fish they caught today...ask them again 5 days after.


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## fishbait (Nov 11, 2005)

ANC, Even though I agree with some of the points you make, I got a problem being preached to by someone who has received much and never reported a single result. I'm sure you lurk so that you learn something to take with you to the water. Why not give us a report about how you did. Even if it's a skunk. Some of the guys you are talking down to are regular and respected members of this board, so since you got such a thick skin, welcome to my ignore list.


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## KodiakZach (Mar 16, 2005)

AU-N-Cdn said:


> some have shown disdain and even animosity towards my presence


Perhaps if you didn't wear a purple hoody and a fanny pack they wouldn't show such animosity


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## okimavich (Nov 13, 2006)

Since we're back on Tourons, I guess I should be expecting someone to post a story and photo about me after my next trip down to OBX or FL heaving a balsac rig.   

_what do you mean you don't have any white perch down here?_


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## Jigmaster (Apr 3, 2006)

*Touron's*

Had it not been for a Touron i would have lost some expensive Equipt! Fishing the the Beach early Oct of 05 as i fished 4 surf rods. A touron 
happened upon me, just when he was getting to his Wallie- Pike story- All 4 Rods doubled over from a passing school of Bull reds i grabbed the most expensive one handing him the second while free spooling the other 2 -after landing the two we proceeded to grab the remaing two spooled and bending toward Africa.
Funny thing was, during the battle another group of Tourons gathered from all the activity. They started asking the usual Touron qustions i just let the 1st Touron have at it- the (Questions actually started as the first two were caught. Ironically all the Tourons were from Canada. It was funny seeing this 1st Touron get rapid fired Questioned from about 3 of the 7 Tourons that came up. Do they taste good ,what are they ,Do you guys catch many Sharks here, What else do you Catch,what kind of Bait do you use,Do you need a License,Can we take a picture with one,how do we pick it up,Can you hold it for me ,"Ya sure Honey" i answered that one!, do they Bite,how far out do you have to cast,What did he say honey,they look like Salmon,is that one Dead,Etc., as thier Kids poked the Fish with Sea oat sticks. All the while trying not to get hooked from the tripple dropper loop rigs while de-hooking took place, as the large Bulls flopped around splashing Fish slime and sand everywhere.




The 1st Touron left exhausted, however i dont think it was from Fighting the Fish.I thanked him and shook his hand as he left. 

This became both my best and worst Touron Experience.

Needless to say i no longer Fish 4 rods anymore only 3 if its slow 2 if its moderate and 1 when its on Fire, dont want to end up like 10 pole Charlie lost everyone to a School of Reds the same year i think.


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## RuddeDogg (Mar 20, 2004)

*Well said Zach*

Well said indeed.


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## emanuel (Apr 2, 2002)

KodiakZach said:


> Perhaps if you didn't wear a purple hoody and a fanny pack they wouldn't show such animosity


Just about spit rum and coke all over my screen on that one.

As for the whole tourist thing, remember, there are tourists and then there's tourons.

Here's a story from the other day. Had a tourist who sort of had the right idea on how to fish for kings, just missing a couple pieces for his rig. So, being the helpful person I am, I rerig him and set him up with one of my nice little king leaders. I retie everything for him, and even hand him a nice frisky bait. He's all excited and his kid is all happy and I go back to fishing. Just forgot to tell him, and probably he should have known to, loosen his drag. 3 minutes later, the whole rig goes sailing over rail at warp speed.


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## Dr. Bubba (Nov 9, 1999)

Jigmaster said:


> Had it not been for a Touron i would have lost some expensive Equipt! Fishing the the Beach early Oct of 05 as i fished 4 surf rods. A touron
> happened upon me, just when he was getting to his Wallie- Pike story- All 4 Rods doubled over from a passing school of Bull reds i grabbed the most expensive one handing him the second while free spooling the other 2 -after landing the two we proceeded to grab the remaing two spooled and bending toward Africa.
> Funny thing was, during the battle another group of Tourons gathered from all the activity. They started asking the usual Touron qustions i just let the 1st Touron have at it- the (Questions actually started as the first two were caught. Ironically all the Tourons were from Canada. It was funny seeing this 1st Touron get rapid fired Questioned from about 3 of the 7 Tourons that came up. Do they taste good ,what are they ,Do you guys catch many Sharks here, What else do you Catch,what kind of Bait do you use,Do you need a License,Can we take a picture with one,how do we pick it up,Can you hold it for me ,"Ya sure Honey" i answered that one!, do they Bite,how far out do you have to cast,What did he say honey,they look like Salmon,is that one Dead,Etc., as thier Kids poked the Fish with Sea oat sticks. All the while trying not to get hooked from the tripple dropper loop rigs while de-hooking took place, as the large Bulls flopped around splashing Fish slime and sand everywhere.
> 
> ...


Indeed. 

That's funny!!! I don't care who you are.


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## TyatCapeSanBlas (Apr 6, 2007)

"Just forgot to tell him, and probably he should have known to, loosen his drag. 3 minutes later, the whole rig goes sailing over rail at warp speed. "

LOL!


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## jettypark28 (Jun 23, 2006)

*The one*

thing i have learned in this forum.....Is that you have to learn "Not to get upset, so fast" and understand the "Thread" for what it is. This started out as a fun Thread, to enjoy our storys and laugh at ourselves and others. Some people here love to play mind games with other. By using words or replys, that most don't know how to take and stir the pot, just to get us going...learn to see past this........ I know that almost everyone here, will help tourist. And if we relate the story to others, just to get a good laugh.....Then whats the harm. And most of the time the person telling the story, leave out everything he did to help the person....So we look at it by only listening to one side of the story. Do we need to start telling everything that we did??? NO.....because we should know already.....that who ever was telling the story....also went out of their way to help the person out.....So don't jump the gun. Trust me if anyone here, went out of their way to put someone down.....The older guys here would come down on that person hard......But this comes with being new, cause i did the same thing also.....Relax and let the "Mod" do their jobs.......And don't be in a hurry to jump on someone A$$.....instead post a reply asking the guys what they meant, by their reply......but do it the right way....opcorn:


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## 3slamman (Oct 19, 2006)

*Here is one*

I was fishing on the beach when a man and his daughter came up and started asking about baits and what we caught down here. One of my poles went off and I pulled in a respectable blue fish. As I was telling the man about what to expect surf fishing down here I recast the pole the went over to put the blue on ice. Not thinking I bent down and cut the blues throat to bleed him. The little girl let out a blood curlding screem and ran down the beach. The dad went after her as I was apologizing profusly. I felt so bad and probably damaged the little girl for life, but I just had to laugh after they left.


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## fishinmama (Oct 14, 2006)

*your blue story reminded me*

fishin the obx many years ago, we would often see another couple with their 2 small children on the beach -- our kids were young then too & they had a little girl who was about my daughter's age...as the days progressed the 2 little girls inevitably ending up playing together often...the mom & dad didn't seem to know too awful much about fishing, but dad was almost always working a line in one way or another -- he would ask about bait or lures & we would help him--finally one day he gets a bluefish & up to his cooler he goes with it, where my then 4 yr old daughter is playing with his daughter ....proudly shows off his catch to wife & kids to cries of "wow, daddy" and "what is it?" -- to which my daughter responds without missing a beat, or even looking up from her sand play, completely deadpan & matter-of-fact... "It's a bluefish -- you have to cut it's neck." (she knew we how we treated blues-- cut & bleed the gills, but at 4 yrs old, out came "neck") -- it still makes me laugh.


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