# Boat Ramp Follies...Wish I had a camera...



## SnapperHunter26

Ok I go to my old boat ramps to see whats shakin and who's doing what, and I see this run down boat with 4 guys and 2 girls pull up to the dock and shut the motor off. Immediately I thought to myself, I have to watch this, I just KNOW this is going to be good, lol, I was not let down. They unpack all there gear, in the process one of them falls off the dock and when one tries to pull her out, he falls in the drink too, so now we have 2 idiots in the water and 4 people trying to figure out how to get them out. Finally after about 5 minutes of hollering and yelling, I have to tell them how easy it would be to climb up the motor and into the boat then try the dock again. They got that accomplished. Now..I look into the parking lot to see what kind of vehicle they have, and to my surprise, I see a old Acura Integra with a decent size boat trailer attached to it  and a Dodge 1500 truck beside it. For some reason I just KNOW that their vehicle was the Acura, and there would be a show being put on in the next few minutes. Well...my god if I wasn't right, the driver of the boat goes over to the Integra and backs it up to the ramp...I am thinking to myself...am I really seeing this? By now there is a crowd of people watching them and scratching there heads. They get the boat partially on the trailer and the car starts sliding down...so they pull the boat back off the trailer and pull the car up more and try again, and it slides backwards again, well after 3 attempts, they decide to put various items behind the tires of the car to keep it from rolling into the water and finally get the boat on the trailer. NOW comes the interesting part. How in the hell is a 4cyl Acura integra FWD Stickshift gonna pull a 17ft boat out of a relatively steep ramp? ITS NOT! they learned the hard way. Before they tried doing this, I walked over and told them and I quote "You all are heading for a disaster, may I suggest a few things?" and they promptly told me to fly a kite. I said fine, and walked back to my post and continued watching the show. Well they tried and tried to get this car moving, and it just wasn't happening, finally one of the guys friend or something came over with a Mustang, and they tied a rope to the front of the integra and to the back of the mustang, and proceeded. Well...the rope snapped and sent the boat, car and 4 people inside of the car down the ramp and into the water. They all got out safely, and now there soaked, and there car is underwater. I know whats coming, and I am just waiting. Finally the driver comes over and asks for my help, and I told him "Nice show man, but no, sorry, I offered before and you told me to basically go to hell, so now...enjoy it, I am going home" and left.


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## MetroMan

LOL! Damn thats crazy!!


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## SnapperHunter26

I know  Sometimes I wish I had a camera phone...


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## SnookMook

Par for the course at just about any ramp over here in the Tampa Bay area on any given weekend day. LOL

That is a good one though. 

MetroMan--Thanks for the great "This Thread Is Worthless Without Pictures" photo. LOL


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## Oldmulletbreath

Boat ramps are like WalMart, when you are feeling down on yourself, just go to one of the aforementioned and hang out awhile...........you are sure to leave feeling alot better about yourself.


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## Grilled Sardine

lol....you should of stayed to watch the ending.


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## SnapperHunter26

Grilled Sardine said:


> lol....you should of stayed to watch the ending.


I can only imagine how it ended...opcorn:opcorn:


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## ncnat

Nothing like the new season of Boat Ramp Idiots, rolls around every spring.


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## MDubious

Why don't people do some research or use some logic...or how about COMMON SENSE! An Integra and a 17ft boat!?! Well it provides entertainmen right? lol gotta love it


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## basstardo

A couple years back I was at Beth Page campground in Urbanna where my wife's mother and grandmother had camping trailers that were setup right next to the boat ramp. I spent many hours watching these knuckleheads, and we even went so far as to make number signs to let people know how they did. If someone was good, and got the boat out quickly with no issues, they got a 10, otherwise, we heckled them and gave them low numbers. It was pretty funny, but the best was this family that pulled up to the ramp to bring their boat out. A guy, his wife, mother-in-law, and two kids. Well, the MIL was a knowitall beeyatch who kept telling everyone what to do, and more or less demanded that she pull the boat out...with a brand spanking new Chevy Suburban. I've seen people who can't back a trailer up, but this woman took the cake. The son-in-law and his wife were trying to direct her to back the trailer up, and she's yelling back for them to shut up because she knows what she's doing. Long story short, she gets frustrated, decides to hit the gas to go backwards thinking God knows what, and she jackknifes the trailer...with the BRAND NEW TEMP TAG having Suburban. And when I say jackknife, think closing a pocket knife all the way. The trailer was damn near wrapped about the side of the truck, the bumper was mangled and twisted under, and the guy and his wife about lost it. I thought there was going to be a killin' at that dock. Finally, the campground security people show up and get them to calm down, and help them get the boat out of the water, althought they couldn't really tow it anywhere because the tongue was bent sideways. Had to be one of the funniest boat ramp situations I've seen. I can't wait to start watching them again this year!


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## sparky27

dont you know humble pie is the hardest to eat??? especially at a boat ramp. hehe, nice story.


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## dirtyhandslopez

basstardo said:


> A couple years back I was at Beth Page campground in Urbanna where my wife's mother and grandmother had camping trailers that were setup right next to the boat ramp. I spent many hours watching these knuckleheads, and we even went so far as to make number signs to let people know how they did. If someone was good, and got the boat out quickly with no issues, they got a 10, otherwise, we heckled them and gave them low numbers. It was pretty funny, but the best was this family that pulled up to the ramp to bring their boat out. A guy, his wife, mother-in-law, and two kids. Well, the MIL was a knowitall beeyatch who kept telling everyone what to do, and more or less demanded that she pull the boat out...with a brand spanking new Chevy Suburban. I've seen people who can't back a trailer up, but this woman took the cake. The son-in-law and his wife were trying to direct her to back the trailer up, and she's yelling back for them to shut up because she knows what she's doing. Long story short, she gets frustrated, decides to hit the gas to go backwards thinking God knows what, and she jackknifes the trailer...with the BRAND NEW TEMP TAG having Suburban. And when I say jackknife, think closing a pocket knife all the way. The trailer was damn near wrapped about the side of the truck, the bumper was mangled and twisted under, and the guy and his wife about lost it. I thought there was going to be a killin' at that dock. Finally, the campground security people show up and get them to calm down, and help them get the boat out of the water, althought they couldn't really tow it anywhere because the tongue was bent sideways. Had to be one of the funniest boat ramp situations I've seen. I can't wait to start watching them again this year!


Terry, invite me and Charlotte for the show, please. I am a really good heckler. We could give out prizes as well.


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## basstardo

If we go up there Darren, you're welcome to drop by. I've got your number still. Some fishy spots up that way as well.


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## clpoudnine23

Everytime I see another "boat ramp folly scene" I tell myself I have seen it all. Then the next time out I say it again. I saw a guy pull a 27' cruiser with twin i/o's out of the water and the sounds from his drive train made my skin crawl. After I pulled mine out I told him in the parking lot, he might be a little on the over loaded side. He gave me a grin and said "This is a Benz (suv), it can handle it"


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## SnapperHunter26

clpoudnine23 said:


> Everytime I see another "boat ramp folly scene" I tell myself I have seen it all. Then the next time out I say it again. I saw a guy pull a 27' cruiser with twin i/o's out of the water and the sounds from his drive train made my skin crawl. After I pulled mine out I told him in the parking lot, he might be a little on the over loaded side. He gave me a grin and said "This is a Benz (suv), it can handle it"


LOL....he got maybe 2 miles?? Benz cant tow a empty cadboard box


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## kingfisherman23

I was at the Six Forks ramp to Falls Lake and these two idiots in a brand-new Air Natique were bringing their boat to the trailer. Like the testosterone-hyped morons they were, the driver started about 10 feet back from the trailer (their truck was so high on the ramp that the wheels weren't even under the water). The doofus revved the engine and ran it up on the trailer. As soon as the bow hit the forward bumpers the trailer's bow supports gave out under the pressure of the whole boat slamming into them. The keel of the boat fell through the space and smashed into the concrete ramp, knocking a big-ass hole in the fiberglass and ruining their $45,000 boat.

I almost peed myself laughing so hard. They evidently didn't see the humor in the situation. 

Evan


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## SnapperHunter26

kingfisherman23 said:


> I was at the Six Forks ramp to Falls Lake and these two idiots in a brand-new Air Natique were bringing their boat to the trailer. Like the testosterone-hyped morons they were, the driver started about 10 feet back from the trailer (their truck was so high on the ramp that the wheels weren't even under the water). The doofus revved the engine and ran it up on the trailer. As soon as the bow hit the forward bumpers the trailer's bow supports gave out under the pressure of the whole boat slamming into them. The keel of the boat fell through the space and smashed into the concrete ramp, knocking a big-ass hole in the fiberglass and ruining their $45,000 boat.
> 
> I almost peed myself laughing so hard. They evidently didn't see the humor in the situation.
> 
> Evan


 to funny


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## RuddeDogg

That's some funny stuff.


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## LEW1

Here"s my contribution:
I drive up to one of the big TVA impoundments in late winter to do some casting practice. The lake is pulled down about 40 feet for winter pool and the lake bed is exposed up in the coves. The boat ramp is about 30 ft out of the water. Here comes a station wagon , probably an old Volvo, full of some local teens out for a thrill. They drive down the ramp and out on to the lake bed to do some creative driving. The old creek channel still has some water in it so they decide to jump it with Daddy's car. Before long they are buried up in mud up to the bottom of the doors. I see an old farmer up at the ramp watching the show. Joining him he says, "Lets let them think about it for a while and then I'll see if I can give them some help. " He had an old tractor rigged up to pull out cars. He told me that he comes down every weekend and makes quite a bit of money pulling out local teens. Humm. Lew in Knoxville.


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## SnapperHunter26

LEW1 said:


> Here"s my contribution:
> I drive up to one of the big TVA impoundments in late winter to do some casting practice. The lake is pulled down about 40 feet for winter pool and the lake bed is exposed up in the coves. The boat ramp is about 30 ft out of the water. Here comes a station wagon , probably an old Volvo, full of some local teens out for a thrill. They drive down the ramp and out on to the lake bed to do some creative driving. The old creek channel still has some water in it so they decide to jump it with Daddy's car. Before long they are buried up in mud up to the bottom of the doors. I see an old farmer up at the ramp watching the show. Joining him he says, "Lets let them think about it for a while and then I'll see if I can give them some help. " He had an old tractor rigged up to pull out cars. He told me that he comes down every weekend and makes quite a bit of money pulling out local teens. Humm. Lew in Knoxville.



 gotta love the good ol boys... they are funny


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## eric

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
lol that honda = owned.
its funny. people have the extra money to buy that boat and gas. yet that cant spend 1000$ for a decent truck or van to pull it..

what is this world coming too.


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## jcreamer

How many times have you seen someone back up on the ramp, load their boat, not secure it and pull out dropping the boat on the concrete. I have already seen that a couple times. Idiots pulled out and the trailer came right out from under the boats.


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## Finger_Mullet

*SLippery dock!!*

A few years ago we were fishing at a local lake. When we were pulling back up to the dock, I was going to jump off the boat onto the dock and run get the truck. My buddy was going to back up and pull hte boat back on the trailer. 

He was driving the boat and I was standing on the bow. He eased up to the dock and I jumped. As I jumped I noticed the entire dock was covered with Canadia Goose crap. I knew this was going to be bad. When my foot came down it immediately slid. Down I go in the middle of the dock covered in goose poop. My entire right side was smeared with foul stinking pooooo. My buddy almost fell out of the boat laughing. There were 2 old men fishing from the bank that witnessed the entire thing. I wanted to crawl under a rock. I stood up and realized that I was not going home covered in crap.

I jumped into the water and got most of it off. I have hated geese ever since. I wanted so bad to go get the gun from my truck and kill every goose that I could find. The lady at the boat house asked me if I have never heard the saying "Slippery as goose shit"??? She still laughs every time she sees me. 

Darin


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## eric

korkers ftw ! but your cars carpet wont thank you. haha


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## New Kent Newbie

The boat ramp in west point is a prime example of all the above on any given saturday or sun day when its warm. If im bored ill go down there with a 12 pack and laugh.


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## kenyee

SnapperHunter26 said:


> LOL....he got maybe 2 miles?? Benz cant tow a empty cadboard box


The first generation ML had a body on frame design and a real low range and towed 5000 lbs w/o any problems. The newer one w/ the unibody doesn't have a real low range any more so it doesn't do as well (I've heard of X5's ripping out their tow hitches because they unibody where they were bolted ripped apart). It's more a matter of knowing what your tools can or can't do


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## Mark G

Number of years ago, I was watching one fairly inebriated fellow load up a small aluminum bass tracker type boat.

He got all lined up with the trailer, and I thought he was in good shape to pull it forward, when all of a sudden he just "guns" the engine.

He flew up onto the trailer and just kept going-- wound up with his boat bow in the back of his truck bed. 

Luckily it was small enough he was able to push it back onto the trailer and get it out of the water-- a little red-faced about it tho--- Lots of people saw that one.


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## JFord56

I got a couple for you;

I saw a good on down at Edisto Beach a couple years back. Was at Steamboat landing - two lanes - one with a fair amount of pluff mud near the bottom. Crowd comes up in a 27' twin I/O cuddy - feeling no pain. Guy jumps out and heads for the parking lot. Comes back with a 2WD old Dodge D50 4banger with stick shift. With both lanes open he opt's for the muddy side. Then 6 tries later -a lot of tire smoke - and the distinct smell of a burning clutch he makes it up the ramp. And one of the people from the boat rides off in a 3/4 ton Chevy????

I came into Live Oak at Edisto once. All kinds of people and red lights everywhere. Nobody on ramps. About 15 boats including myself waiting to take out. A roll back backs up to the ramp. A guy in a wet suit scuba outfit comes down to the water. Then I notice something red under the water. Scuba guy pulls cable and goes under. A few minute later the winch pulls up a brand new Dodge Dokota 4x4 still with paper tags with a really bent alum trailer still in tow. Use to be a hole near the end of the ramp. Guy had his wife driving the truck. After stalling and choking down a few times she freaks and bails out when water got about 2' deep. It all went under running??? Hadn't even made the first payment on it yet.


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## rsqchief5

This didnt involve a ramp, but it did involve an idiot with more money than sense.....

Going back 10 years or so...Sitting at the light in front of Food Lion and Wal Mart coming onto the OBX. I am directly behind a Dually that has a Fountain center console, 30'+ at my guess. It was a triple axle trailer. I am telling my buddy how much this guy has just in engines as he has triple Mercs across the back. Light goes green, and the dually and trailer move forward.....the boat rolls right off the trailer and lands right in front of me in the road. We got out and walked around the boat and met the owner walking back. He is fuming mad....all 3 of us see the bow strap neatly rolled up at the same time. It wasnt hooked up. Boat owner says " and the award for the dumba$$ of the year goes to me!" We nearly pissed ourselves laughing.....


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## fishcrazy

*Panama City*

If you google panama city marina they actually have a webcam that is pointed at the boat ramp. If you are ever bored on a Saturday afternoon just pop it up and watch the hilarity ensue.


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## SnapperHunter26

Finger_Mullet said:


> A few years ago we were fishing at a local lake. When we were pulling back up to the dock, I was going to jump off the boat onto the dock and run get the truck. My buddy was going to back up and pull hte boat back on the trailer.
> 
> He was driving the boat and I was standing on the bow. He eased up to the dock and I jumped. As I jumped I noticed the entire dock was covered with Canadia Goose crap. I knew this was going to be bad. When my foot came down it immediately slid. Down I go in the middle of the dock covered in goose poop. My entire right side was smeared with foul stinking pooooo. My buddy almost fell out of the boat laughing. There were 2 old men fishing from the bank that witnessed the entire thing. I wanted to crawl under a rock. I stood up and realized that I was not going home covered in crap.
> 
> I jumped into the water and got most of it off. I have hated geese ever since. I wanted so bad to go get the gun from my truck and kill every goose that I could find. The lady at the boat house asked me if I have never heard the saying "Slippery as goose shit"??? She still laughs every time she sees me.
> 
> Darin


Now I can JUST see that happening and I almost fell off my chair laughing, thanks for the good laugh, I needed it.


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## SnapperHunter26

Lord have mercy, reading some of the other "boat ramp reports, and highway reports" leave me on the floor laughing. I especially love the one about the D50 stick pulling that I/O out when the guy left in a 3/4 truck opcorn:opcorn: thats got to win googan of the year award.


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## striperswiper

i watched about 12 mexican guys pulling about a 19' boat down the street past my house to the ramp. they didnt have a car or anything just the little front wheel down and pushing it  when they got to they ramp and lined the trailor up straight. half of them jumped in the boat and the others pushed the trailor down the ramp and jumped on for the ride. it was hilarious watchin them do that and then pull the trailor out of the water. i wish i was there when they came back in. BTW all 12 guys were in this boat.


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